“You make me chuckle when you say that you are no longer young, that you have turned 24. A man is or may be young to after 60, and not old before 80.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.
Lately I’ve been talking to a lot of young people and what has popped up is a particular age fraught with emotional issues; 24. Both males and females seem to encounter problems at this particular age. For girls, they are grappling with guys who don’t want to say, “I love you” and can’t commit. Many males don’t engage in sex saying they are tied up in their careers, or doing other activities like running to the gym three times a day!
The females are frustrated and long for a relationship and they see their men all the time and really want them to come through. This can go on for a few years or longer while they hope the guy will finally settle and be with them the way they want. That happens once the guys turn 27 on. So if you are 24, listen up. You need to look at your goals and maybe don’t let a potentially great relationship wither away. Now I’m not suggesting you have to engage emotionally commit, or even have sex, BUT why not? When you look throughout history what is especially interesting, (not for parents), is that very loose women have ended up with some fabulous men and great lives. Pamela Harriman is but one example. That the men don’t push for this is indeed surprising to me. All the dating stuff that is there at every age is also part of the picture.
Who calls whom, who causes fights, who makes up, where you go, who pays, and all the rest. The physical part is the area that doesn’t happen to the full extent. While it is true many females get clutchy, demanding, and jealous and guys feel pressured and want to have their options open, there is still the possibility of having a good, and learning experience. True, you are not at the end of the line, and marriage is not even an issue here, but you can try your wings at love and all that it involves; the great and the difficult. Love is not learned or experienced overnight or more than usually probably twice in a lifetime. That stuff that every generation copes with, writes songs and poetry about is all that it’s cracked up to be, so jump in. ‘Starter’ boyfriends and girlfriends are wonderful. They will help you as you move along this journey. Look at your peers who have taken the gamble.
Even in the best of circumstances with much experience and maturity monogamy is not always sustainable. Forty percent of women and sixty percent of married men report affairs. Maybe they needed even more relationships in their past to know what this love thing is all about??? No matter what your age when you are attracted and long for someone the feelings are the same. You light up around them, dress for them, hang on every word and gesture and want to be SO close. That feeling that you don’t want to live without them is universal. When there are problems or you feel any rejection you want to DIE! Yes, that’s loving someone. To be afraid at 24 is normal. To be afraid at any age is normal. Love can be scary. Sharing thoughts, feelings, and a body is frightening, BUT, you cannot ever have it without going through the process. It is a process and you have to want it, and be brave to reap the rewards.
I am not talking about ‘needy’ people here, just the normal run of the mill males and females wanting to share their entire selves in an open relationship. It may take many trials to trust that you can love and be loved for yourself, but keep on trying until it happens BECAUSE there is nothing, and I mean nothing like it on this earth!!! And do remember you are not 24 for life!
“I sometimes think we all die at twenty-five and after that we are nothing but walking corpses, with gramophones inside.” – George SantayanaYou’re Twenty-Four… It Ain’t Easy